Arq at Home

What's your current state of mind
Self Forgiveness. It has definitely been the hardest season of my life becoming a twin mom and now a mother of three. I have gotten serious about my healing due to my PPD and PTSD getting worse by the month . I think when a lot of things go wrong in pregnancy and birth the mother wants someone or something to blame in order to process it all, and so we often tend to blame ourselves for lack of more control over it all. Instead of just accepting that there was nothing in our control. I have been in a cycle of self sabotage which I am not proud of. I've realised self-forgiveness is a daily practise, that it's hard, that I am capable of hard things and that there is beauty in this mash up of mixed emotions, lots of babies and sleepless nights. 
Name the last work of fiction you enjoyed
The last thing I read was when I was pregnant with the twins, it's a series of graphic novels called Sex Criminals. 
Suzie, a librarian, and Jon, an actor, meet at a party and end up sleeping together. They discover that they share the ability to freeze time when they orgasm. As their relationship develops and their sexual histories are explored, they decide to rob the bank where Jon works in order to save Suzie's endangered library. IT IS WILD. 
What feels luxurious to you right now?
Time for music. It has been super difficult to get back into writing music post birth of the twins. Also the idea of performing again feels terrifying and liberating all at once because it was cancelled for so long. Time is also a major factor so when I find myself with the time my whole body begins to settle and I finally feel completely home again. I finally have an evening to myself tonight so am getting stuck into my guitar and synth tonight <3 
All Images by Paige Wood