When the Amaryllis belladonna start to appear around the city, it is a sign that summer in Cape Town has come to an end. The Jersey lily, belladonna lily, naked lady lily, or March lily is a plant species native to the Cape Province in South Africa.
I have always been very drawn to these flowers, mainly because they appear around my birthday. I have a tattoo on my arm of them that has bled out over the years but I still love it regardless. Their pink, translucent petals remind me to be softer and kinder to myself.
When I was about 20, I would stop on the side of the highway and pick them so I could have them in my bedroom. Sometimes, when I drive past them, I laugh at myself for being crazy enough to pull over on the highway with my hazards on ; hazards, just for some flowers.
Luckily, I have made peace with the woman I was then, putting myself in danger for something so temporary. I guess that comes with being young ; being fearless and doing rather than thinking of the consequences.
I think about my daughter and hope she won’t be as reckless. But maybe I’d make an exception if I knew it was for the sake of the flowers.
The pink reminds me of this work, which is now part of my March Print Drop, I Am Afraid I Have Forgotten. I love this work so much. The original was painted on raw canvas and bled out unexpectedly.
It is the change of season; summer was long and sweet, and I held the ones I care about most, played chess on the beach, wrapped gifts haphazardly the night before Christmas, and processed all that has passed.
I feel a sense of huge loss as the winter months roll in and as I face great change. I am feeling naked, stripped of things I thought I knew. There are plenty of things I feel uncertain about, but this is what I am certain of: the garden, the soup I will make, winter crafting with the kids, and finishing paintings next to the fire.